My Journey

Yesterday I had some energy work done. The result, a renewed spirit full of light and love. A definite weight has been lifted, thank the Universe. I feel like a new person. I am so deeply  thankful for those that have been with me and that have helped me throughout this journey.  A rock has been turned, I can feel the warmth of the sun, the cool whisper of a breeze……although there is still plenty of soul work to be done, I am at last feeling. If you have ever felt like your vibrancy, the feelings of emotions, your vitality had evaporated into thin air, as though it was stolen from you and you felt at a loss as to where to begin to look, a feeling of extreme exhaustion and helplessness, then you know how I have been feeling these past few months. I wasn’t sure how to dig myself out of this deep depression. I refused to call a doctor and be prescribed “uppers”. I knew that something was terribly wrong, like something had broken. And not only was it affecting me, but those I loved.

The journey that started last summer, this path of discovering who I am, taking care of myself, loving the child I am of the universe had led me to a holistic approach as to how to nix this state of darkness. My intuition told me that I was experiencing something outside of my control. I didn’t need a Band-Aid to help. I knew that somewhere deep within, these negative emotions were becoming stronger and were taking over my life, it was as if there was a dam that had been broken and it was threatening to take over my entire being with its inky deep void. These negative characteristics (jealousy, extreme anger, sadness, exhaustion, defeat, fear) went against the grain of who I am naturally. I missed my energetic self; the person that was typically always laughing, loving life, loving those around her. I had become a monster and I needed to stop it dead in its tracks. With help. So I went to an energy healer not really knowing what to expect or what would take place. I did not expect to dive into my past, pull out skeletons, revisit those feelings and become a blubbering mess. But I did and it wasn’t very pretty. The healer started working with these energies, taking what was bad, healing my spirit slowly and deeply. Towards the end of our session, I swear I heard birds singing so clear and beautifully, instruments being played in the distance and I felt so at peace I heard myself stating that I never wanted to leave.

Once I did leave, I left lighter. As though something had been physically removed. I feel awakened, less burdened, I can hear the birds, feel the sun, see my friends in a different light. A dark veil had been lifted. I get emotional talking or thinking  about it because I was in such a dark place when I had sat on that table and I feel such love and happiness now, such gratefulness for the universe placing Cleo (the healer) into my life. I am now back on that path, but with a much clearer state of mind and focus. I am working on becoming that spirit I always wanted and was meant to physically be. Enjoying this journey, living in the now, working on a better me. One that can offer back to the universe what it has given me. I, as always, hope to inspire you to fall into loving yourself, taking care of you and allowing yourself to rely on the universe for help. Always follow your intuition. Your body knows when things are off. Just listen to it. To  become who we are meant to be means that we need to be healed, let go of what has been holding us back, shed the  negativity. I want to become a beacon of light and love for not only myself or my loved ones, but for the entire universe. Those are my goals. I want to live in love, feel love, be in love for all that exists. I am looking forward to unraveling my shell and discovering the core of who I am. I haven’t quit met her yet. But I bet she is beautiful, just as you are.

Much love,
Carla 

Returning

Time flies when you are having fun or out chasing dreams. If life had a map, mine would be a one laden with new paths and some dead ends. I am coming to a point now that I am ready to return to what I had started a year ago….I yearn for the familiar, that feeling of coming home. I have been on a long journey, diving deep into the sea of my inner self, uncovering who it is that I am. I have made remarkable progress, but it is time to rest. Take a siesta in a field of wild flowers, gaze at an ocean of stars, allow the mind to simply unravel and float free. Thinking and over thinking comes natural to me. Keeping my thoughts silent is a struggle. Some questions in life cannot be answered by others, research or the internet. The answer lies within and the only way to hear it is to be peacefully silent. Another release that I have always found incredibly helpful is writing. At times I seem to answer my own weighing quandary’s by just letting my thoughts flow through my fingertips to pen to paper (or keyboard to screen). So here I am again! I have missed my blog and revisiting has aroused a sense of longing and beautiful nostalgia. Have you ever looked back at a photo or maybe your own journal and thought to yourself, wow, I have lead a beautiful and abundant life. That is what is so profound about writing. You can easily forget a moment, but once its jotted down to remember or captured in a photo, you can forever revisit. Why did I ever stop? Life gets so busy. But I am making a promise to take the time to do that which helps me grow or can bring peace to my life, or can help myself tap into my higher being.

Immersed in the simple pleasures of life. Indulging in a good book under the refuge of a huge maple tree that sits high on a hill overlooking the gorgeous Hudson River with the Catskill mountains as a back drop. It is peaceful and  there is always a playful breeze making its way across the fields. A simple cloud in contrast to the blue sky captivates me as I sit at work and gaze longingly outside. It is so incredibly striking that its nearly ethereal and I have to wonder if it is real.  I drive with my windows and sunroof open, taking big deep breathes of fresh air,  allowing the sun laden summer breeze and Led Zeppelin carry me away through valleys of lush greenery and hawks capturing my awe as they glide above. A visit to the ocean reminds me how vast and yet small we are. The salty air awakens my senses, the cry of seagulls and rolling waves bring my soul to a state of peace. I allow her to take all my worries, anxiety and petty issues out to sea, where she can swallow them and return to me love and a reminder that my body and mind are sacred. Closing my eyes and taking in the sounds around me, I repeat these simple words: I am blessed, my life is abundant, I am loved, I am worthy, I am at peace with life and I am open to what the universe has to offer. When we slow down and take in our surroundings, drink in the beauty that our Mother has to offer, the gifts are priceless and are abundant to our lives.

I am returning to be inspired and inspire. What brings me the greatest joy is to help others love who they are, to reach for what may seem unattainable and to encourage you to be the person you are truly meant to be. We are forever changing and growing. It is not always easy nor always a beautiful process. But like the lotus, we emerge from dirt and rock to reveal our true being. Take time to be silent. Take time to walk barefoot and soak up all that earth energy (it is free and abundant, so be greedy!). Retreat to the forest, embrace her soil, drive your roots into the depths of her love. 

Many Blessings. 

Carla 

A Re-Cap :)

Thought I would share my life currently via snapshots! Just when I thought things were going to settle down, life offered me an opportunity of a lifetime and its been a whirlwind of creativity! As my father told me "we do not allow grass to grow under our feet". Taking after my dad, I move from one project to the next, I love to grow and to have my head deep within a plethora of subjects, knowledge is food to my soul. But I am hoping to create deep roots within this new role and stay for a while, a LONG while. There is SO much to learn, so much so that I will never comprehend it all within my lifetime.

I will save all the details for my next post. In the meantime, life has been sweet. Time spent with my family out playing in the water this past weekend was loads of fun. It was the perfect afternoon together. I hope everyone is enjoying these hot summer days doing whatever it is you love and making the best of them!! I am relishing every minute :)

Soul Food

Coming down from a whirlwind of festivities this past weekend, I have given into my body's need to relax. No plans, nor schedules. Just surrounding myself with good people and focusing on my new journey into yoga and taking the time to read good books. 

After a long year of planning and prepping, my family and I celebrated the marriage of my youngest sister to her best friend. I am so incredibly happy for them, they make the best (and cutest) couple EVER! I loved every second of every minute within each and every hour. Between the prepping, family get together's, the sister time, it has been such a bonding experience as a family. To see it all transpire in a perfectly momentous day and to return to reality, my ultimate goal is to continue to nourish these relationships I have with my siblings. My sister's are my kindred spirits. 

 Catching up with my girlfriends has taken precedence during the week. Lunch dates at some of the best places around our little town has been so nice. One of my favorites, this simple Mexican food truck "Once Upon A Taco" which serves the best taco's around and fresh squeezed watermelon lemonade! HOLY! Its a few blocks away from work, so taking the time to sneak in a walk and good food is an awesome treat. These little things in life are sometimes taken for granted. But I am acknowledging how blessed I am to live in a thriving town that has hidden gems throughout :)

Thursday I spent the evening at the Won Dharma Center with some of my favorite ladies, finding inner peace and tranquility. The grounds alone are breathtaking. It was exactly what was needed to restore my soul and find balance.

Even though work has been interlaced throughout it has truly been a fabulous week spent nourishing my soul with family, friends and good food!! 

 

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Back With a Bang!!

{Back with a Bang, get it?! LOL! Super corny! Still getting used this new look myself though....}

Now that tax season is over and I have been able to fully unwind, I feel as though I have truly hit the reset button and have gotten to enjoy the comforts of home. I had a much overdue date night with my husband accompanied with new business contacts that have become friends through my husband's business. They are such a great couple, I am in much hope for a future get together! We had a great time at a local brewery, I enjoyed a delicious dinner of bacon wrapped shrimp stuffed with wasabi sided with an array of fresh steamed veggies, it was heavenly! It was so nice to share laughs, great conversation and just relax. I was also able to see my husband's work (beautiful remodeled bathroom), which I rarely get to see in person. He is so talented and it was amazing to see his craftsmanship in real life, I am his number one fan-girl!  In all, Saturday was simply smashing!

{There is something so magical about spring and waiting for those first blooms. These are some beauts}

Sunday was just as divine. My husband took the day off to spend with Logan and I, we enjoyed a lavish homemade breakfast. That has always been a tradition of ours and its THE best way to start off a family day. I whipped up some scrambled eggs, used a heavy hand with shredded cheddar cheese. Then sauteed onions and potatoes, both of which came from our local CSA. Tossed in some fresh pork sausage, sprinkled it with dill and freshly ground pepper. Sided with apple slices and of course a frothy cup of coffee, it was delicious!

{So happy that my hens and chicks have made a comeback!!}

We then did some fun shopping together. My husband bought me a small greenhouse that I am completely over the moon with! Whilst the weather refuses to warm up, I am keeping it in our living room. As soon as it warms up, I will move it to our mudroom. But for now, I rather like it right where it is. I have never started a vegetable garden from seeds, but there is simply no going back. I have gotten the utmost enjoyment watching our baby plants grow, nurturing them. Its so exciting and amazing! Putting together my greenhouse and lining our little Dixie cups holding our future veggies on its shelves was a delightful way to spend my afternoon soaking up the little bit of sun that there was.

{All planted with organic love}

Afterwards, Logan and I took off on the four wheeler to do some forest foraging. We found all sorts of artifacts. We brought home a beautiful birch branch, which is now showcased in my kitchen waiting for herbs to be hung and dried. We also found a perfect sheet of birch bark which I will be framing, its AHHHHmazing. We then took off down towards the creek to collect rocks in which we will paint and use as markers in the herb garden. It was a grand adventure and seeing the excitement on my son's face as we collected together is always priceless.

        

{I was super duper excited when I came up with the idea to hang this little birdhouse from my branch and pop a tiny airplant in its hole! I mean, cereal?!?!}

The best ending to our afternoon ride was when he picked me some flowers and had us smell them together, he is just the best and I am so smitten with my little guy. He makes my heart swoon :)

{He is the blue to my sky} 

To end our perfect Sunday, we painted, one of our favorite crafting activities we do together. Then cuddled together and watched 101 Dalmatians, which he took a keen fascination to. It was by-far one of my favorite weekends of all!!!!! 

 I have missed you and now that I'm back, I'm feeling as though I've connected with an old friend and hopeful for the future! I am so glad to be back! Leave me a note, I would love to hear from you! 

{Love life, because life is too short NOT to!}

A Case of the Blahs; Rejuvenated

Hope ya'll had a fantabulous weekend!!! We finally had a warm front so we were able to head outdoors for some much needed fresh air and vitamin D! Last week I had a serious case of the blahs. Between my  work load increasing, temperatures staying below zero, my boys being sick (that includes my husband since I only have one little boy technically) and a nasty case of cabin fever, it's not a rare diagnoses round these parts of the northeast hemisphere. 

But I was able to shake it off this past weekend with the help of much needed sister time, which included lots of gut aching laughter, crafts for her upcoming wedding, a makeup trial run (which was done after a few glasses of wine, you can imagine the outcome, lol!) and the love sisters share. 

My entire family benefited from her visit. She has a natural calming quality that soothes and comforts, she is like home. She is medicine to my soul. And the laughter between us is the best of all. If I could spend the rest of my days in a fit of laughter, my world would be ideal. That should be an added life goal! 

If you're a mother, you will completely relate I am sure. My son is three. We flew through the two year stage without a hiccup, he was my sweet darling boy with a heart of gold. And....he still is....but with added sass, independence and I swear he is on the brink of turning 15. The defiance! To get a kiss or hug from the little dude is like begging for the moon and I end up looking the pathetic baby! Lol!

But this weekend, this weekend he overcompensated for lost time (yup, pathetic). He gave me my hugs, kisses and "I love you"'s on his own accord! My heart and mind have been in full swoon mood. I soaked it up like sea sponge! Oh the joys of being a parent (and I mean that in every way)! 

We ended the weekend visiting my parents (aka the grandparents). They are my bread and butter. I needed the comfort that parents can give. They love you even in your ugliest of moments. We took a nice walk, splashed in melted snow and laughed about life in general. I am so thankful for my parents. 

I think when it comes down to it, all we need or want in life is to love, be loved and to laugh, along with a purpose to live. Thus the overused cliche "live, laugh, love". I suppose it's overused because it reigns true to so many. 

Although Monday's can be the pits, I am refreshed and ready to start a new week with a new attitude. Hope you have a great day as well!!

Carla, XO

The Filet Mignon of the Forest Wild

(Found on Pinterest, I couldn't resist it!)

I was lost at the first touch of his large rugged hand on the side of my face. I quickly found myself  swooning over this man, vowing to live forever within the earthy confines of his huntsman cave where deer looked statuesque on walls and guns hung with pride behind glass cabinets. It was a life I found mysterious, with foods I have never tasted before , recreational activities that entailed crazy nights in moonlit trails and I have always been drawn to the unknown, a sure challenge. In saying this, there were challenges on his end as well. He  had to accept my vast wardrobe, one that took up an entire spare room, my taste of fine wines, lavish shoe collection and wild big hair. Mind you, this was MANY moons ago and we now share a closet (mine being the larger half, of course!), yet the shoe collection remains, as well as the hair!! People have raised a few eyebrows throughout the years, we aren't a couple you would assume to be together. But, what is it that they say…..opposites attract and we live happily ever after, forever figuring out how to mesh our two intriguing personalities......

(My brawny husband, along with some photo's I captured this past weekend when we took a family hike through our woods)

Let’s get to the real topic:  MEAT. VENISON. The filet mignon  of the  redneck society of upstate New York.

 And: I LIKE it. The redneck society. The ones with big trucks, mud on their tires, flannel shirts, rough rugged hands……and the venison. Meat. The kind they hunt and bring home. Deer. From the forest wild.

I didn't always claim to liking it. I did not grow up with a household of hunters. My meals were pretty much the typical All American cuisine. But being the good sport that I am (HA!), I gave it my best taste bud forward. And at first, they weren't having it. In fact, I believe I most likely turned 50 shades of green. I knew if it came to it and the man had to choose, he would surely pick the meat over me. He is a "meat and potatoes" kind of man, the true love that wins his beating heart. And if he were to continue to hunt, our freezer would continue to be full (because on a rather serious note, if you kill, you eat. Hunting is not simply a sport in our family).....and his one and only sport that he is passionate about is: hunting. There was no way of getting around it. Thus the experimenting began. 

(The rugged men in my life)

I do love to cook.  And as I stated before, I do enjoy a good challenge. I enjoy trying to figure out ways to prepare venison, experimenting with different ingredients to cut the game flavor to a minimum and to keep the meat from becoming too dry. Venison is naturally very lean. So if you were going to use it in meatloaf for instance, you'd want to add eggs or a fattier cut of meat, like pork sausage to give it moisture and to help it to stay it's form. 

(Greek Meatballs with Tomato & Red Pepper Puree paired with my herb salad, delish!!)

My two "go to's" for cutting the game flavor down and infusing great flavor is to first sauté the meat in olive oil and fresh garlic. Once it has browned slightly, I add red wine, the dryer the red the better to enhance the earthy flavors, think Merlot. Most recipes I incorporate venison in also  calls for stewed tomatoes because the acidity pairs well. Once you become familiar with venison and its character, you will get a feel for what might work and what might not when trying out new recipes!

Since my family and I have currently been sticking to a super healthy Mediterranean lifestyle of dining, which consists mostly of seafood, white meat and legumes, having a course of red meat is a very nice treat! The other day I made a kick-ass dish of meatballs (recipe below), paired with an herb salad, chopped pears, crushed walnuts, crumbled goat cheese all lightly drizzled with olive oil infused with a fig balsamic vinaigrette which is out of this WORLD!

If you do not feel adventurous enough to try wild game, feel free to use beef in the recipe or even turkey! Either way, try this out, its way too mouth watering NOT to! If you are like myself and have experimented with venison, I would love to hear your secrets!! Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!

XO, Carla